An Insane Rainbowcy by Toast

1.10 – A Wonderful Guy

Last time on the Sparkles….

We had surprise!twins. I named them Pinkie Pie and Tom Cruise. Barbie became a gorgeous, but bitchy teen with crazy ass default sleepwear. Virgin and Dmitri became Middle Aged and had midlife crises. SR’s future wife became a YA well before him because she’s an ass like that.

Now, if it pleases and Sparkles, we’ll get on with chapter ten…the last Ginny chapter before the heir poll. *sniffle* I’m not sure I ever had the intention of actually getting past the first gen. I’m strangely proud of myself. Okay, onward to chapter ten!

Since I’m very horrible at remembering traits. I wrote down Tom Cruise’s! He was born with couch potato and loves the outdoors. ‘Cause that’s so interesting and all. Oh well. His crazy genes make up for it. >.>

Oh and fair warning to all. I’ve been in utter agony these past few days so as I’m writing it this I am high as a mofo on pain killers right now. So, chances are that I’ll find something really funny that will be really stupid to y’all. Have fun with that. >.>

Oh, hello there.

That’s right, we have Pets now! Which of course means that we’re getting a pet for the Sparkles. Meet Butterball, the Skittish (or is it Anxious?), Hyper, Clueless dachshund. I gotta warn you in advance, there’s a lot of Butterball pic spam going on while Pets has that Shiny New* gleam to it. So, Butterball goes inside his new home to have a look around.

Or you know, freak the fuck out.

Butterball: What is this place?! Where am I?!

You got adopted silly, you’re now a Sparkle!

Butterball: I don’t like the sound of that! *FREAK OUT*

Seriously, already?

Why did you freak out at Dmitri? What did he do?

Butterball: I don’t like him.

…ookay.

So as you can see from the above picture, I forgot to change Pinkie Pie into generation-appropriate pajamas. 😛 Oh and I had one Pets causality – Pinkie Pie’s hair. It’s completely gone from my game, which is weird because the only thing I took out was Twallan’s mods. Also as you can see the twins got their imaginary friends. 😀

Here’s Pinkie Pie’s imaginary friend: Gummy.

Named after Pinkie Pie’s pet alligator, of course.

And here is Tom Cruise’s friend, Katie Holmes.

Named after…well, you know. 😛

* * *

For the first time in his life, Dmitri is a doting father.

to one of his kids.

Ginny: You know we had twins, right?

Dmitri: I’m still not convinced that one’s mine.

Aww, poor Tom Cruise. No one loves him but Katie Holmes. Oh and Butterball.

Butterball: I can smell his alien soul.

So no one has uploaded this video to you tube, which makes me want to cry. Since WordPress is f-ing stupid and doesn’t let you embed shit properly, here’s the link to the video. It’s “What Scientologists actually believe” if you didn’t know. Them’s some messed up people.

Butterball: Tastes like raspberries.

o.O

Then I switch over to Dmitri…and this pops up:

I swear to GOD I will fucking murder you.

Ginny: That wasn’t very nice.

Deal with it. 😛

* * *

So, then quite randomly I got one of those opportunities for the parents to go on vacation and leave their teens home alone. I know an excellent TEHLOLZ opportunity when I see it, so hellz yeah. Let’s send them on vacation.

Let TEHLOLZ begin!

So, its the middle of the day, the kids are on their way home from school and the twins are somehow home alone with the maid. I’m focused on the teens as they’re heading home from school when I hear this music I’ve never heard before. It’s not uncommon for me to randomly hear little bits of music from other households because of story progression. So I ignore it and decide to switch back to the house to see if the maid has actually cleaned or not. Most commonly she comes in, makes the beds, eats our leftover cake and leaves. Of course she charges 125 bucks for this service too. Still, all of this is better than the repair lady who works out on our treadmill then verbally assaults one of the kids and leave. All while charging me 50 bucks an hour. If I wanted someone who used my stuff then bitched at me, I’d get a roommate.

Lol anyway. So I go back to the house and then…

Oh…hello.

I’ve never had a break-in during the day. Though, you know most break-ins actually do happen during the day. You know, when people are most likely to not be home…like in this case. But, you know…that’s okay because we have Butterball our faithful guard dog! He’ll attack this burglar and send him home crying.

Oh. Right.

/Sigh. Just don’t take the ice hamper. If you take the ice hamper I will be forced to annihilate you (Thank God for Twallan)

Maid: Uhm, maybe you shouldn’t be doing that. Please, stealing is wrong. Okay?

Yeah uhm…maybe you could CALL THE POLICE?!

There goes the dartboard…

and the shower.

Oh good, you guys are here! Quick, call the cops!

SR: I can’t get there!

Where? You don’t need to go anywhere, you have your phone on you..somehow…I don’t want to know where you keep it in that outfit. Barbie? Surely you have your cell phone?!

Barbie: There’s no path, I can’t get there either!

…are you kidding me? Look, he’s getting away!

:O Who called the cops?!

 

Pepto: I did.

:O Whaaaaat?

PB: Then I stopped him from leaving by being on the front stoop the same time as him.

:O Pepto…I…I love you.

So then, the cop comes and tackles the robber to the ground and proceeds to fight with him on the stoop. Or you know, impale herself on the stairs. Either or. Also, am totally aware of my unfinished wall. I forgot to do it when I first redecorated the Sparkle house and have since left it because it makes me giggle.

Victory! And look at Pepto walking back inside the house.

* * *

So after the whole robber shenanigans went down, the Sparkle teens decided to do what every teen would do when their parents are out of town: throw a party. Of course. Since Salmon Roll is the oldest and knows the most people, he threw the party…and of course, he dressed in his best snazzy pink suit.

Uh oh. A female in pigtails approaches a Sparkle man with his picture in her thought bubble…this isn’t going to be good. I invited Fawn to the party, but she refused to come. /sad face.

Hmm, so I guess that’s: Nature = 2, Nurture = 3. Maybe Dmitri DOES exist in these kids 😀

Here is Daisy, Fawn’s sister.

Daisy: Oh HELL no.

Tell her, Daisy! Gotta watch out for your sister’s man.

The party is going fairly well and we’ve got a nice little turnout.

Are you enjoying the party, bud?

Pepto: it’s pretty boring so fa- wait…who is that?

I don’t know Bud…why don’t you go talk to him?

Pb: Hi, I’m Pepto Bismol Sparkle.

Adrian: Wow…really? I’m Adrian Moore. Your name is really Pepto Bismol?

PB: Yeah :/

Adrian: Haha, well that figures. You do have an older brother named Salmon Roll.

Awww, they’re getting along so well. The two continue to talk continuously for about a sim hour when…

Barbie: *SQUEAL*

Oh Jesus, no. Barbie! No! Bad! Crap, she looks just like her mother.

Nurture = 4, Nature = 2.

Barbie: Hi, I’m Barbie…Pepto, will you excuse us?

…wat? No, Barbie! Let him handle this on his own, he was doing well. Don’t ruin it!

Barbie: So, you’re talking to my older brother? Do you like him?

Adrian: Well….

Barbie: I think my brother likes you a lot. But he’s too shy to make the first move, so if you like him…you should. But, if you break my brother’s heart I’ll rip off your  balls and make you eat them.

Wow…Barbie, that was actually…nice of you. o.o

Barbie: Don’t get used to it.

PB: Oh hey, so uhm. What did you talk to my sister about?

Adrian: Well, she gave me some advice…which I’m going to be taking.

<3<3<3<3<3<3

Adrian and PB: *love*!

Barbie: Damn I’m good.

So our two love birds decide to go outside to catch a little fresh air and look at the stars. ❤ While I’m swooning over their new romance, I get a pop-up.

oh shit.

So, I tell Barbie to break up the party because naturally, the parents are coming home. This is how she chooses to do it:

Barbie: OH SHIT!

Barbie: GET THE FUCK OUT!

Of course this means that Adrian must say goodbye to Pepto, but I don’t think that’s the last we’ll see of him.

Pepto: I’m in love, I’m in love, I’m in love, I’m in love, I’m in love with a wonderful guy!

So, the parents come home and despite the fact that there is NO mess and no children left behind Ginny freezes and stands in place for 20 minutes while the game decides she has to go scold Salmon Roll, which means of course that they’re both frozen in a high traffic area and are screwing up everything for everyone around them. Hey, EA: Eat a Bag of Dicks.

Virgin: Because I’m somehow a magical wizard, I know you had a party while we were gone. You’re grounded!!

-.-

* * *

Now, after long last, it’s time for the Twin’s birthdays! Yay! They’ll be real people now! Except for Tom Cruise…nothing will help that.

I don’t know why, but him as a cowboy makes me giggle like a crazy person.

Tom Cruise ages up with the Evil trait. How strangely fitting.

Aww, precious little Pinkie Pie. She’s going to age up into someone beautiful and fun. She will be the normal child…I can just see it.

Dmitri: I don’t think this one’s mine either o.o

Can’t fix the derp face but good lord that’s better.

Pinkie Pie ages up with the alligator dog person trait.

The excitement proves to be too much for Barbie, and she pees herself. She leaves her shame on the floor without mopping it up.

Oh hey there Butterball, haven’t seen you in a while. How are you doing buddy?

Don’t you do it! Butterball, no!

Awww. Cuteness might make up for nastiness. MAYBE.

awww

Awww! I can’t take it anymore! You’re forgiven!!

* * *

I’d now like to take a moment and present to you…Barbie gets pranked by Salmon Roll.

Salmon Roll: teehee.

Well now, I think that’ll do it for this chapter. The heir poll will go up in a couple of minutes!

 

So, in a few minutes I’ll be posting the heir poll, please vote! 😀

Comments on: "1.10 – A Wonderful Guy" (7)

  1. Aww! I loved it!!!

  2. Dreamy Underwood said:

    RIMBLMAO.
    Barbie is a all powerful magical wizard *strikes magical pose* Also, The all awesome Pink Man Panties saved the day and got a special friend. I was right on tumblr also during this chapter iTune played ‘Don’t unplug me’ by All Caps which is about Computer Love. Impressed by Nature v Nurture

    Loved the Chapter. NOW, LET ME GET ALL OVER THAT HEIR POLL *jumps and runs around frantically*

  3. Yaaaay Sparkle update!

    Oh gosh, Butterball is epic. LOVE those freak out pictures. He looks so fragile!

    Hahaha @ Katie Holmes.

    How have I not seen that episode of South Park? D:

    “If I wanted someone who used my stuff then bitched at me, I’d get a roommate.” XD Trudat.

    Oh God. That pic of PB in his pink manties, with that epic hero music in the background…I am dead.

    Adrian! <333 Kid that hot's gotta be gay. Perfect for PB!

    "Adrian: Well, she gave me some advice…which I’m going to be taking." That. Was. AWESOME.

    "They’ll be real people now! Except for Tom Cruise…nothing will help that." Bwahahahaha.

    Oh gosh, poor Barbie…all those pranks! lol… and SR just giggling about it…totally cracked me up.

    I know just who to vote for!

  4. Yaaay, update!! I loved the update. PB cracks me up, and I love Adrian too. I think I know who I’m going to vote for, though TC was tempting me with his evil ways. Bwahaha.

    I love Butterball too. Cute! ❤

  5. Everything in this chapter is perfect ❤
    Butterball you can come live with me, I love you! 😀

  6. omg, I am laughing so hard there are tears pouring down my face, and my kids think I have gone crazy. 😀 I love this blog, love it to itty bitty pieces.

  7. Hilarious!!!! I loved heroic PB! That part was awesome!! The twins grew up cute…and I’m loving all the Tom Cruse references. Can’t wait to see who wins the heir poll!

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